Words had failed me for the past 3 years of my dad’s passing because I deeply wanted a longer life for him as God’s compensation for losing mum at 16 years. Regardless of the number of years you both lived, you have raised a champion, a resilient, strong woman. Mum, you taught me to be a woman who can stand on her own, an empowered female never to look up to a man for survival but to be a pillar of support. You were passionate about education and did everything in your power to ensure i and my siblings got it to the highest level. Dad, you did your best in taking up the role of both mum and dad,helping me focus on the more important things of life when i was still single. You never forced me to get into an unprepared marriage and supported my quest for an MBA abroad when the societal expectation was to chase after marriage. I recall the joy you expressed getting calls from my friends on one of your birthdays and how i constantly celebrated, took care and honoured you while you were on earth. You were ageless till your death. Oh, what wonderful genes you had and transferred to i and my siblings. You were assumed as my boyfriend the day you came visiting at the University of Ibadan, that’s how youthful you looked. You had a strong work ethic, so enviable we had to force you to retire. It’s a really high standard that i struggle to meet. You are so selfless and refused to have a big party at your 70th due to the strange illness that overtook me, your baby during the period….. We postponed to your 75th birthday, but the cold hands of death took you just as we approached it. You were humble to admit your mistakes and called us as children to forgive your mistakes – so much strength as no one is infallible. Mum, you sacrificed your time for our education, always keeping tabs with our performances and monitoring each progress in ingenious ways. Dad’s death left me angry for the past 3 years, i have been struggling to put back the pieces…. I was speechless for most of the period and only covered up with activities, doing what needed to be done at the time. Speaking from the experience of mum’s death, time hardly let the loss or wound go….. We only move on and Some circumstances will force back the memory. Having my daughter forced back my mum’s memory and the realisation that the gap will never be filled. We only continue to remain strong. It is this understanding that has kept me mute for so long since my dad’s passing because i know this shoe will never be filled but gone forever………In all of these, i have remained strong and choose to be as there is no other remedy than to be strong. ADIEU PAPA AND MAMA…….
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